Timing

Have you ever felt as though you weren’t in sync with time?  You know, I’m of the age when I “should” be married, I’m of the age when I “should” have children, I’m of the age where I “should” be professionally secure, etc.  The quality of my ENTIRE life has been based on timing.  Needless to say, I have always been out of sync with time.  When I was married, I based my marriage on time.  It wasn’t the right time.  I had children before I understood what being a father really meant.  Professionally, well, let’s just say that I am now keenly aware that the best job in the world is the job that you would be willing to do for free.  In the past, I have worked for money.  Today, I work for joy. (Money too, I mean I just have to be happy with what I do.)  Timing.  I now realize that there is no such thing as the “perfect” time, for there is only your time.  There is no time.  There is only time.  It’s never too late to start, and it’s never too late to begin again.  Hell, reset is my new normal.  Thank God I didn’t completely follow the plans that I designed for myself while I was in high school.

When I look back on my life, my greatest breakthroughs and joys came at a time when I least expected them.  For example, I really had no plans on going to college.  The truth of the matter is that I only decided to go to college after I was fired from my factory job.  I never thought that I could make it without that job.  Looking back, I now realize that I could have never made it with it.  My failures and falls brought my greatest adventures and lessons.  When I was younger, I was terrified of failing.  Today, I realize that failure is the key ingredient in the dish called success.  Now, here I am looking forward to the next forty years.

Over the course of the next forty years, I desire one thing; to be happy and connected.  In the past, I was connected to some people that didn’t really make me happy.  I felt together and alone simultaneously.  There didn’t seem to be enough room for me, my dreams, my beliefs, or my ideas.  Therefore, I became them.  I hated myself for doing it.  No more.  Today, I am okay me.  Who am I kidding?  I’m learning to be okay with me.  Family, don’t chase time, and most importantly, don’t waste time.  Don’t waste a single moment trying to convince someone to love you who consistently shows you that they don’t.  Don’t waste another moment giving time to those who only desire to take it, never to give it.  Don’t waste another second beating yourself up for things that you can no longer control, as they are in the past.  Don’t waste another day hating the life that you are currently living.  The truth of the matter is that like an incorrect mathematical practice problem, if you’ve made mistakes in your life, simply do your best to begin again.  I promise you, when you look back, you may be surprised by all of the joys and wonders that you are certainly going to find along the way.  I’m no expert.  I’m simply looking for company on this wonderful journey called living.  As I begin again, I pray that for those of you who are also trying to begin again, that we find happiness and peace wherever we may land.  Patrick

As always, this week, please do something to help someone else for no other reason than to make their lives better.  Again, if you make it to where you’re going, please don’t forget to leave a map for the rest of us.

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