Since I’m quarantined in my home, I decided that I need to have a conversation. Therefore, I have chosen to have that conversation with you. Do you know that I have always thought there was a difference between resting and sleeping. To me, resting means just that; you’re resting for short periods of time in order to have short bursts of energy. Sleeping, well, that’s another matter. Sleeping means that your spirit trusts your space so much that it allows your body to submerge into a transcendental universe. In order to truly sleep, you must both trust and know. Perhaps this is why most of us sleep better in our own beds. We know everything about our beds. With that knowledge and several nights of experiences, we always trust to have a good night’s sleep. Lately, I have been pondering the sleeping man. When I was a young(er) man, when I found myself in bed with women, after satisfying the hunger of my flesh, I would rest. Remember, short periods of rest for short bursts of energy. I rested with them, and like most periods of rest, I always knew that I would never sleep there. I never chose to see the new morning sun with them because I always knew that their true value to me existed beneath the moon and the night winds. My body craved, and their flesh fed. Like a stomach with no bottom, the more I fed, the less I felt. Suddenly, out of nowhere, came a woman that gave me pause. Before my body craved, my mind wandered and wished. She made me excited and glad to be in the moment with her. I was aware that I was experiencing something that was greater than my expectations, stronger than my fears, and more powerful than I ever felt. She showed me love. She showed me that friendship, partners, teammates, parents, lovers, sometimes enemies, and family can exist under the same roof with two people. She taught me love. She made manifest of everything that I always believed, but never for me. When we made love, I swear, the scent of her skin permeated honeysuckle and the taste of her skin was like warm salted caramel. Amazing…When we were full, we would lay above the sheets while experiencing the warm dance between our heat and the cool of the night. Sometimes, we would talk. Most times, we would sit in silence and experience the affirmation of God together in our minds. For the first time in my life, I reached for something other than the coldest pillow in my bed. I reached for her. She let me pull her in. I held her like I was her warrior. She pushed against me as though she was shielding her son. We held each other, and despite our bodies saying enough, I believe that our hearts said, “keep going.” I loved her, and she loved me. I know that because each time that she saw me in the morning, she smiled at me. Can you believe that? She actually smiled at me. Shyly, I would always smile back. She was the melatonin to my mind, the reason for the rhythm of my heart, and the other half of my broken soul. Me, I am her sleeping man. I’m so tired…. Patrick
As always, this week, please do something for yourself for no reason at all other than to make their lives better. Also, if you make it to where you’re going, please don’t forget to leave a map for us. Love is bigger than COVID 19, and always choose Love..