Relationships While Black.

I am guarded as hell. I am guarded because every time I put my guards down, I was reminded why I needed to keep them up. My brothers are guarded. My sisters are guarded. My cousins are guarded. My friends are guarded. My teachers were guarded. Their teachers were guarded. My friends are guarded. I have been guarded all of my life. You see, I was raised by a Mother that poured her hope into me. Yet, this same Woman also raised her daughters to never be like her. Never depend upon a Man. Have your own money. Never let anyone raise their voices at you. Never allow anyone to cheat on you, come back, and do it all over again. Never, and I mean, never, let a man raise his hands to you. This same Woman taught me to trust Love. Money doesn’t have any real value. A soft whisper has greater impact than a roar. True Love knows no boundaries. Lastly, warm and genuine hugs are far more impactful than anything that can be purchased at a local pharmacy. It’s true, Mothers raise their daughters and nurture their sons. To me, it appears that daughters are raised with the truth of their Fathers shortcomings, while sons are raised with the hope of becoming all of the things that their Fathers never were. In rapid succession, raised daughters and nurtured sons are meeting in bars, libraries, supermarkets, schools, and all other places of social engagement. I don’t have to go into the obvious, for the data is overwhelming. It’s not working. Black Woman, to me, you are the closest thing to God within the finite confines of this Universe. This is true. Like God, you are expected to not only forgive, but also bless, the very people that you have given your life to while it seems that they’ve only given you their asses to kiss in return. You are expected to show Love while feeling pain. You are expected to give hope when only feeling, and experiencing, despair. You are expected to always be together, ready, patient, kind, and strong. Strong…. As a Black Man, it seems that we want a Strong Black Woman until she reminds us that she’s actually stronger than we are. Those Nurtured Sons…. I am a nurtured Son. That doesn’t mean that I’m weak. I’m just nurtured. I sometimes resent the masculinity in you, as I am sure that you sometimes resent the feminine parts of me. In no uncertain terms does that mean that I’m not a Man. Nor, does it mean that you aren’t a Woman. It simply means that we MUST be accepting and understanding of our beautiful differences that have brought us to the same place; the possibility of TRUE LOVE. This isn’t a mistake. Personally, I believe that Men remain boys until a Woman acknowledges, accepts, and professes that he is, indeed, a Man. If Men don’t like what I just said, I, too, am a Man. We can discuss this. If Women that are raising their son’s are trying to interpret this, don’t do anything differently. Your Sun needs that Love. If Women that are raising daughters are trying to interpret this, please understand that, if our Lives are to continue, because you are a Woman, pour equal amounts of hope into both your daughters and suns. Black Woman, I am in awe of you. I was raised by you. I live for you. I desire you, and only you. You are the definitive example of my Life’s work and worth. Lower your guard and let me in, for I have made room for you….Patrick

Another again. This week, please do something for someone other than yourself for no reason at all other than to make their lives better. As always, if you make it to where you’re going, please don’t forget to leave a map for the rest of us. Always Choose Love Because Love Changes Everything…..

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